Monkey mind should be ignored

Half of the problem, or maybe even most of the problem with an unenlightened mind is the 'monkey mind'. The part of our brain that won't shut up. It can lead us on endless wild goose chases like I have mentioned before. The monkey mind is the enemy of faith in Amida Buddha. It keeps me wanting to explore and not trust in the Buddha, It tells me there is ways I can be enlightened in this life despite my karma. The monkey mind likes to keep you confused and scared but also full of hope that you can become a buddha here and now, which is false.

There is ways to quite the monkey mind.....

-Meditation - It works. It helps. It's not perfect though. Your monkey mind may be suppressed and easier to ignore, but it's still there and gets louder when you don't keep up your practice.

-Booze - Drinking shuts your mind up, but drinking too much or too often isn't good for your health.

-Nembutsu and forget - What does this mean? It means don't worry about your mind. Know it's tricks and say 'it's ok my mind is telling me that I can save myself and that my cat will die next week because my mind is talking out it's ass and it doesn't speak the truth'. Then say the Nembutsu and smile because Amida Buddha has got your back.

Namo Amida Butsu

Almost there....again

As I mentioned in my last post I recently thought I had figured out enlightenment again. Thought that I was so darn close to taking that step into figuring out everything and how to acheive all my goals and desires. I have been there countless times without every 'figuring it out' but it doesn't seem to change the fact that I keep getting drawn back there. And that's my karma. The karma of a seeker. Some ego comes with that too. A seeker sometimes thinks they are better then those who realize their inability to save themselves. As I said...karma.

It gets tiring trying to save yourself spiritually. Over the recent holidays I felt like I always had to do something to keep my path towards enlightenment going. I got sick of it and in my desperation muttered the Nembutsu and remembered Amida's wonderful vow to save us unenlightened fools.

When I was a Christian I felt the same. Always having to pray or read the Bible to feel 'connected'. I was a Calvinist too meaning I shouldn't have to do anything but there was still 'expectations' of what a Christian should do. Amida says 'don' worry'. Say the Nembutsu and rely on me,

Ok. I will do that.

Namo Amida Butsu

I'm back after another circle of unenlightnement...

Once again I am shown how I am a fool and unenlightened. For the last month or so I was once again caught up in the idea that I found a path that would lead to all my desires being filled and eventually to be enlightened in this life. I stopped saying the Nembutsu even though I liked saying it. It's like I knew if I kept saying it I would not forget that this path was just like all the others I posted about. I didn't listen and I did forget and chased another white rabbit around for a month.

I won't lie, the experience was interesting but it all of a sudden hit me one day it's a path I have been down before. Oh how foolish I am to forget to say the Nembutsu and remember the vow of Amida where I can be a buddha after I die in his Pureland.

So yesterday I started saying the Nembutsu again and I think that is good. There is no magic rushing of 'extascy' at saying this phrase again. No magic or supernatural feeling. Just the knowledge that I am back on a path to eventual enlightenment in the Pureland. Also it feels peaceful to know that it's ok to be the unenlightened fool that I am because Amida has my back with is vow.

I post this to show that even when one lectures about the way of the Nembutsu, it doesn't mean they are enlightened. They are still a fool like myself and I hope you stay on the path of the Nembutsu and if you leave it you come back so you can escape the Samsara.

I'm lazy and that's ok

As much as I loved my spiritual walks and various journeys in the end I always got lazy with the practice. And when I got lazy with the practice I would usually get frustrated and feel disconnected from that path. Most likely I would eventually leave and move on.

My path with Amida can be similar, except now I know that it's ok to be lazy with your spiritual practice. Even when I am totally not interested in my 'shinjin' (faith in Amida), I know even if I mutter the Nembutsu just a few times, all is ok. I am unenlightened and not expected to save myself in this life from the samsara, or ever for that matter.

Of course being diligent and studying the Dharma is important, but not stressing about it is the key. Only do what you can and what you want to. You can't save yourself by reading the becoming a Dharma scholar, but it can help you on your journey with the Amida.

Focus mostly on saying the Nembutsu as much or as little as you want. That will remind you that even though you may be lazy today, it doesn't matter because it's Amida doing the work that will take you to the Pureland, not you. Being lazy can actually be a benefit to your shinjin, as you will learn to rely more on Amida Buddha and less on yourself for enlightenment.

Namo Amida Bu

I'm happy, even if I am unenlightened

Many people say, 'why are you so down? why are calling yourself unenlightened? you seem so negative about your life!'

When I hear this I tell them that I am not down, I am not negative, but I am unenlightened. I actually get great peace and happiness knowing I can rest in Amida's vow and I no longer have to worry about my spiritual path, but I am still unenlightened.

And that doesn't mean I or anyone else can't do wonderful things in this life if it's our karma to do so. I will admit there is many things I am good at. I know people who do and create amazing things. This is not what I am talking about when I get down on my enlightenment. I could build 10,000 bridges of amazing engineering, and I could be proud of that, but it won't make me enlightened. Spiritually there is no way to save myself, except through Amida's vow.

Simply put, feel free to pursue your goals, dreams and desires. Be proud of your accomplishments, but remember, when it comes to spirituality or your enlightenment, there should be no ego there, as you can not become enlightened in this life or the next, without the Amida Buddha's help. And that doesn't mean him helping you do the work of enlightenment, but you taking your hands off the wheel and turning over your enlightenment completely to him. All you need to do is trust in the vow and say the Nembutsu when you remember to. And even if you forget to do the Nembutsu as much as you would like to do, no worries....

Namo Amida Bu

Not interested in Buddha Dharma today...

...and that's ok. An unenlightened chap such as myself finds it hard to stay interested in such things for a long period of time. So I just say the Nembutsu a bit and know that Amida has got me covered. In past paths I would really get down on myself if I lost interest in my practices. No more, thanks to the vows of the Amida Buddha. It is so amazing how even when I am 'meh' on Buddha Dharma that saying the Nembutsu instead is so reassuring.

Namo Amida Bu

It's ok to not always think what you think is right

The title may not make the most sense, but let me explain. In my past experiences with different religions and ideologies I always felt I had to 'tow the line' of what that specific path valued. For the most part this was really difficult as alot of the time I didn't really agree.

When I was a Christian I felt I should be against gay marriage or the homosexual lifestyle in order for my views to line up with Christian 'values'. The problem was I had NO problem with gay marriage or homosexuals. I felt I was being torn in two different directions. One way was what I really thought and the other with what I thought I should think.

Another example was when I got into neo-paganism (more specifically Druidry). It was heavy on nature and the environment. While I like to do what I can for the environment, I found this path made me feel I should care more about something which I wasn't really passionate about. It felt fake.

Thankfully via the vows of the Amida Buddha I don't have to worry about what I think anymore. If I feel strongly about something, by current path won't make me feel like I have to change it. All my path wants me to do is trust that I will be reborn in the Pureland and say the Nembutsu. Beyond that, nothing is expected of me. It's real liberation to feel that. And even when thoughts enter your head that maybe disturb you, don't fret, as they are only thoughts and unenlightened beings such as us can't ever be totally in control of our thoughts, no matter how hard we wish and believe we can.

Give up the fight

Seeking can be fun. I am a seeker and have been for many years. I enjoyed all the different paths and beliefs systems I explored. Although I wasn't sure what I was always looking for, deep down I was looking for enlightenment. Trying to seek my way to 'gnosis' so I could have it all figured out. As I mentioned in past posts, it never worked. There were times I was close to the goal, but it was always just out of reach.

I am still a seeker today, but that's not really overly positive, but it's my karma. Luckily the Nembutsu is there to keep me from jumping into many more pursuits that always end the same way. It may sound like I am 'closing off'' some aspect of my life and my mind by trying to limit my seeking, but I see it more as getting of the merry-go-round to nowhere. That's why I am thankful for the Nembutsu. Always keeping me at peace and knowing it's ok to give up the fight to try and be enlightened. It's just not possible in this life and this age.

Most of my struggles have been caused by endless seeking. It's my karma, but by the vow of Amida and with Nembutsu as my tool I am able to somewhat counter that karma and rest in Amida's promised Pureland.

Namo Amida Bu

Thankful for Amida

How much peace I get from saying the Nembutsu and resting on the vow of Amida. I am an unenlightened fool but Amida doesn't care. He understands me and will welcome me to the Pureland where I can be a Buddha. What a beautiful Sunday morning to reflect on his vows.

Namo Amida Butsu. That's so simple yet so effective in bringing peace to my heart. Now I can relax and not worry about things so much. Namo Amida Bu!

Don't worry about the Pureland not being exciting

The Pureland sounds great. Becoming Buddhas, eternal bliss, free of delusion and destructive passions, etc. But why, you might say, am I not excited about it? Because we are unenlightened. Something so wonderful as the Pureland seems 'ok' to us who are stuck in the samsara. We enjoy our passions and delusion here in this life, so this 'fairy tale' place we will visit after we die sounds 'ok' compared to a movie and a nice drink. And that's all right. Don't feel bad that you don't lust after the Pureland. I sure don't. I like my video games and scotch too much to want to die right now and go to the Pureland, but I do get peace in the back of my unenlightened mind that when I do die, hopefully many years from now (because I like it here more then the Pureland), that I will go to the Pureland and become enlightened. Maybe I will look back and see how foolish I was to not lust after such a beautiful place.

Namo Amida Bu

No permanent solution in this life

People have been trying to 'fix' themselves forever. Different religions and philosophies litter history. The ancient Greeks saw the pursuit of philosophy as a way overcome the problems in their lives they had. Probably very similar to the issues humans face today, except now it's the endless parade of self help books that are pushed and explored instead of philosophy. I have read several, I know may people who have, and they all kinda work, but nothing is ever permanent. I always hear from Pentecostal and Charismatic Christians talking about the next great revival that will set the entire 'church' on fire. It never comes, but it's always around the corner. The issues of being an unenlightened human still persist.

People can't seem to let go of the idea that we can't really permanently fix ourselves. We are unenlightened, but many don't want to except that this is so. There must be a religion, philosophy or book that can teach me true enlightenment.....well there isn't. Now don't get me wrong, I am all for techniques and ideas that bring you peace and can help make your life more pleasant, but they should be pursued free of the idea that they will be IT. And by IT I mean the FIX that will FIX you and bring you enlightenment.

That is why I am thankful I finally decided to take refuge in the Amida Buddha. The realization that there was no path that would lead me to ultimate enlightenment was in itself the most peaceful and happy realization I have had. Trusting in Amida's vow that because I can't erase my karma from many lives that keep me unenlightened, I instead allow Amida to do all the work. Upon death I will be free of this karma and go and live in the Pureland. Namo Amida Bu.

My monkey mind

I always prided myself on my practice of meditation and other techniques that let me control my mind. I won't lie, the techniques can work, but I still had a 'monkey mind' even if I try and deny it.

"Do meditation with me, it will help you." I would tell everyone. And I am not saying there is no benefit, but there is no enlightenment there either. You still have a monkey mind and are unenlightened, even if you meditate all day, every day. It's better to be honest with yourself and meditate for the benefit (as many do) that it can provide and not for any higher ideal of enlightenment or making yourself better, because your karma is always there to prevent your enlightenment in this age of Dharma decline.

I actually find my mind is pretty peaceful now and I don't even meditate anymore. I just do the Nembutsu and I know that my monkey mind is ok, because it's my karma and the way I am. I know there is people with a worse monkey mind then me...way worse....so I am just happy I only have to deal with what I have. It's ok when your mind runs off, because the Nembutsu has you covered. The Amida Buddha in all his infinite compassion has you covered, monkey mind and all.

Namo Amida Butsu

No need to worrying about feeling

As I explored other paths I remember many you had to 'feel' something. This feeling sometimes came a lot when you first started exploring a new path, then started to fade as time went on and the excitement died. Many forms of Christianity want you to be 'on fire' or 'filled with the spirit'. It's hard to always be filled or on fire. Luckily for us the Amida Buddha just wants you to chill in his vow. No special feelings. Maybe some peace knowing that you will be reborn in the Pureland. A simple mental assent that you want to be in the Pureland, a few Nembutsu's and go live your life. Your life of ups and downs. Happiness and worry. It doesn't matter because if you cling to the sleeves of Amida you will be reborn in the Pureland upon death and be a Buddha!

Who am I?

You may ask who is this guy who tells me what I should think about Amida. Well to be honest I am not much. And by that I mean I am not a long time follower of Amida. I am not a priest or a scholar of the sutras. I am just a chap who is happy that he finally has peace about his path and can chill out and be content knowing that he can rely on the vow of the Amida Buddha to lead me to his Pureland where I can hang out as a Buddha.

What's not to like about that?

Well you know what, I can understand why a person might not like that, because there have been many times where I would have said that sounds lame. I followed many a path that promised enlightenment or for my dreams to come true or just simply to be at peace. None of them delivered. Maybe for a time they did, but in the long run, not so much.

I have been a Christian, Zen Buddhist, Neo Pagan, Noahide, Gnostic and Deist. I have explored Islam, Hindu thought and the occult. While I must admit I did learn much from my journeys, none of them lead to the peace I desired. Why? Well that is a good question and I will love to cover that in future posts, but for now I will say they always seemed to want to trade. This for that. We give you this, you give us that....

Now I don't mean in a material way, but in a spiritual way. I know many will say this is not so, but it was my experience. It is also my experience that the only path that offered everything in return for NOTHING is the endless compassion of Amida Buddha and his Nembutsu.

Namo Amida Butsu

Can it be this simple?

Of course it can! Why can't it? Our minds like to complicate things. Make things seem very hard. Commonly called the 'monkey mind', our thoughts can work against us, telling us we must do this and that. Telling us we can be Buddhas here and now. Our minds are unenlightened. If our minds keep convincing us we can become enlightened now, then we will walk in circles trying to find this enlightenment!

'Oh it's right there!'

'That's not it..."

'There!'

'Nope....that's not it either.'

Our minds can be at peace when we accept the reality of our situation. When we realize the karmic debt that weighs us down and keeps us stuck in endless rebirth of the samsara. By reciting the Nembutsu we can be free of this debt and upon death move into the wonderful infinite light of the Amida Buddha and his Pureland.

I have tried the complicated way for many years and traveled many different paths, only to discover they always lead to the same place. This place is the realization that I am unenlightened. But the mind keeps telling me that if I just keep seeking then enlightenment is just around the corner. So the monkey mind leads us on another wild goose chase only to end up at the beginning again....

At this beginning however there is always something there. There is the Nembutsu. It's always there to be recited as a symbol and affirmation of the infinite compassion of the Amida Buddha and his vow to save all beings from their karma and rebirth. Not on any condition that we must become 'pure' or follow some 'precepts'. Amida understands you and expects nothing but to say the Nembutsu a few times and wish to be reborn in his Pureland.

Namo Amida Butsu

Namo Amida Butsu

The Nembutsu feels good to say. Not because it's magic or some new-age idea that is meant to make you happy and rich. It feels good because it means we can rely on the compassionate vow of the Amida Buddha to save all us unenlightened people in this age of no Buddha's and bring us to the Pureland where we can be Buddha's. There is no catch, no hidden costs. Just as we are when we recite the Nembutsu, even a few times and desire to go to the Pureland, we will be welcomed there upon our death. Free of karma and the samsara of endless rebirth. We don't need to be better people or go work in a homeless shelter or soup kitchen (although there is nothing wrong with that and it may make you feel nice inside). All we need to do is recite the Nembutsu and chill out. Let your mind run away with silly ideas of enlightenment while you relax and know you have enlightenment waiting for you in the Pureland, but not before.

Don't judge

I speak for myself as well when I say 'don't judge'. We forget that people have karma, not just from their past but from previous lives. This might impact them in ways that we may not understand. Back when I thought my meditation made me superior because I had control of my unenlightened mind, I would look at people with monkey minds (like I don't still have one!) and think 'if only they practised the zazen like me, they could happy like me'.

Not everyone carries a karmic debt so we must be careful when we look down on people and judge them. If you see a homeless man on the street, maybe give him some money. If you know he plans to buy some booze with it, don't care and don't judge. If you don't want to give him money then just try not to judge. If you still judge him then that's they way it is for us unenlightened folks and the Amida Buddha will not judge you unfairly when you are welcomed into the Pureland!

Karma can be changed

One can always change their karma in order to have a more peaceful and happy life. I touched on it in the previous post that one should try to do things that will 'improve' their present lives. The issue comes though of how big of a 'dent' can someone make in their karma.

You have to consider a life time of karma and not only that but many past life times of karma. You can make small changes in your life to help alleviate current karma. Examples could be some meditation to help with anxiety or eating more healthy food to increase energy and well being. But consider the person who has severe mental health issues due to childhood trauma or the alcoholic who hasn't gone without a drink for 40 years. That is stuff that can't be fixed overnight or with some simple techniques. Alot of karma won't have a remedy in this life and we will carry it over to the next life....

Amida Buddha's vow however accepts the person with severe mental health issues and the 40 year drunk. He doesn't judge but welcomes them to the Pureland where their karma is destroyed and they can become a Buddha. A Buddha just like the studious monk who meditates every day. Maybe they will be a Buddha even before the monk, as the monk still thinks he can erase his karma in this life and that he can become a Buddha maybe in this life. That is the hard way. Let's take the easy way and be welcomed to the Pureland.

Improve yourself for you

The Amida Buddha saves you how you are. You are not expected to become some great saint or even some super duper compassionate being. The Amida Buddha knows that you are unenlightened and that in this age you cannot become enlightened. So does that mean you should not try and improve yourself?

Of course not. There are reasons to improve yourself. If you are a drunk you should try to be more sober for your health. If you are always angry you should do what you can to calm your temper so you can be more at peace and also for those around you. You get the idea I am sure. Amida promises nothing in this regard, only to eliminate your karma once you die and take you to the Pureland where you will be a Buddha.

So it is good to improve yourself, but if you find you can't at times then don't worry, the ocean of compassion that is the Amida Buddha's infinite light is plenty deep enough for you and your karma.

Expect nothing

Many religions say something will change in a man or woman when they accept this new path. Christianity as an example says a man will be filled with the Holy Spirit and this will help him in his walk with Jesus. Other Christians, such as Pentecostals or Charismatics might even say that once a person is baptised and receive the Holy Spirit they must show proof like talking in tongues. Expect none of this from the Amida Buddha....

Nothing special will happen when you decide to accept Amida's vow of rebirth in the Pureland. No overwhelming change will occur except the peace you might get from knowing you will be done with the samsara and perhaps the peace provided by the simple words of the Nembutsu. Maybe don't even expect that. If you do expect something like butterflies or tingles down your spine or perhaps a new purpose to move forward as a better person then I am afraid you will be disappointed. Keep it simple and just say the Nembutsu and wish for rebirth in the Pureland and that's it. Take peace from that and go about your life doing what you want to do.

Namo Amida Butsu

Natural compassion

When one begins to recite the Nembutsu, they began to appreciate the enormous amount of compassion available to them via the Amida Buddha's vow. As mentioned before, it's like an ocean, limitless in its amount. Something else interesting happens though as well when you recite the Nembutsu, the compassion begins to manifest in your life as well.

What do I mean by this? Simple. When you have faith in the amazing amount of compassion available to you, you can't help but feel more compassion towards others. It's not like you become a saint or anything. You are still the same unenlightened you, but you should be able to notice more compassion in your thoughts, words and actions towards others. If you don't then that's fine too. All that matters is the Namo Amida Butsu.

Around in circles

You can't become enlightened in this life. It's just not possible. I tried, believe oh how I tried. It doesn't work. You might think it's working, you might feel you make great progress in certain directions, but in the end you aren't enlightened. You still accumulate great amounts of karma and carry over karma from past lives. 

Now I am not saying one shouldn't try and 'move forward' towards the idea of enlightenment, but I would suggest you do it more as an experience or an exercise rather then any spiritual goal. My spiritual efforts were always like going around in a circle. I would think and feel like I was making huge strides, but after a few weeks, months, years I would find I was back at where I began. Maybe a little wiser, and that's a good thing, but overall no more enlightened then I was when I left. 

There is great freedom in admitting you can't help yourself escape this karmic cycle of rebirth. You let the ego go and say 'Namo Amida Butsu' and have faith that the great compassion of the Amida Buddha will take you past all the karma and unenlightenment that keeps you bound and deliver you to the Pureland upon death. 

And again I say, that does not mean you can't try different ideas and paths to improve yourself, just know it's really not going lead you to becoming a Buddha. So abandon the spiritual ideas and just do the exercises. If you like to meditate, meditate, not because you think it will enlighten you, but because it keeps you at peace. Or on the other hand, don't meditate and just say Namo Amida Butsu and chill. 

I am who I am

I wake up this morning and some things bug me, then I realize that is just my karma. It's ok that they bug me and realizing that makes them not really bug me anymore. All the expectations other paths put on their adherents to change can be crippling. How lucky am I that I discovered the endless light of compassion of the Amida Buddha. As Alan Watts said;

"... you don't have to do a thing to justify yourself, and you don't have to justify not justifying yourself. So, there is something quite fascinating and tricky in this doctrine of the great bodhisattva Amitabha, who saves you just as you are, who delivers you from bondage just as you are. You only have to say "Namu Amida butsu."

Come as you are to the ocean of compassion that is the Amida's vow. There is no pressure, no expectations, just the Pureland, where you will be a Buddha.

Ocean of Compassion

I saw this the other day on a Buddhist forum and thought it described the Nembutsu very well....

'Three important things the Nembutsu encourages are humility, self-acceptance, and compassion. I am a foolish being, incapable of attaining Buddhahood by my own power alone (and foolish for many other reasons as well.) There is this great ocean of compassion which accepts me just as I am. I will then go on to be compassionate and accepting toward others out of gratitude for this great compassion. Every time I say the Nembutsu, I am reminded of these truths.'

Beautiful words. A GREAT ocean of compassion, that can never be emptied. Accepting you for who you are. Wonderful.

Namo Amida Butsu